Saturday, October 12, 2013
Crazy Heart
I just came across this movie while going through the IMDB list based on Music themes. Its a good movie and hoped to watch it someday. That was like a year ago I think.
Finally yesterday got the hold of it and watched it having beer. That made a whole new experience for it. Musicians are not sure what they are going to write about. The lyrics just comes to their mind like thoughts. Its hard to relate. They just think that something they wrote is good and so does everybody else , the audience that hear it. So, sometimes they come with a piece that noone appreciates but they themselves. The movie was beautifully written and the songs selection was excellence at par. The movie start with building pace into what's going on in the musician life with some insight into his past proficiency in the music industry. The songs that runs into the background completely give perfect landscape of the protagonist. He is angry at some but no one in particular. He seems un-contended with what he is getting but don't want anything in particular. Just seems that he wanna survive the storm to pass buy. Punishing himself for something he think he deserves. Hell bound destiny. Struggle was his only way through it seems. As the movies paced smoothly over the period towards the end. Finally, he became sober for someone and went back to find out its over. He went back to his boredom routine. To feel free again of emotions that bound him once. Laughed when past reinvent itself with different reality. Its all fate in the end.
Songs to look for in particular :
Finally yesterday got the hold of it and watched it having beer. That made a whole new experience for it. Musicians are not sure what they are going to write about. The lyrics just comes to their mind like thoughts. Its hard to relate. They just think that something they wrote is good and so does everybody else , the audience that hear it. So, sometimes they come with a piece that noone appreciates but they themselves. The movie was beautifully written and the songs selection was excellence at par. The movie start with building pace into what's going on in the musician life with some insight into his past proficiency in the music industry. The songs that runs into the background completely give perfect landscape of the protagonist. He is angry at some but no one in particular. He seems un-contended with what he is getting but don't want anything in particular. Just seems that he wanna survive the storm to pass buy. Punishing himself for something he think he deserves. Hell bound destiny. Struggle was his only way through it seems. As the movies paced smoothly over the period towards the end. Finally, he became sober for someone and went back to find out its over. He went back to his boredom routine. To feel free again of emotions that bound him once. Laughed when past reinvent itself with different reality. Its all fate in the end.
Songs to look for in particular :
- Hold on you.
- Brand New Angel
- Falling and Flying
- I don't know.
- My Baby is gone.
Sunday, September 08, 2013
Train to Osmania
On 27th of aug I got this mail from Mr jagdish Shetty regarding Conference on National-Security Our perception , to addressed by Dr. Subhramanium Swamy to be held in Osmania University on 31st of aug. I told about this to few of my friends at office of which Abhishek and Bhawani agreed. Though Bhawani said at the end. So me and Abhishek went there and it was none less than an adventure. The venue was changed but wasn't conveyed to me so it took us more than half an hour to finally reach there. I decided to take few books that I ordered on Social Media as watch dogs to give it to few people there.
We started from my home with a friend. He talked to one of his team mate who knew places around and asked him which stop to get off from MMTS. We inquired anyway from the counter and they told that they have a stop at JAmia Osmania on a train which goes to Phalaknuma. It wasn't long before we were on the train and we talked about personal and political stuff. I told him few things that i have noticed during my previous visit to Swamy g's conferences as it was his first one of this kind. He was very much calm and thoughtful. He has been like this since past few days. Don't know might be cause of personal stuff.
On one of the stop , don't know which one, I saw an old man, very old man selling some snack in a towkri he got up on the train. He was old. His legs were bend both of them. Don't was it cause of his old body or cause of the load he was carrying in one of hand. He was limping while walking. His whole was shaking while he was looking around for some customers. He was wearing a pare of thick glasses, quite old they were. I wasn't able to look through in his eyes. He wearing an old dhoti tied in a way that they were reaching till his knees only. I was just watching him and suddenly I asked him for a deal of roasted ground nuts. He was carry two kind of snacks one roasted ground nuts but wasn't able to figure out the next one but they were familiar and I know that I don't like them. He stood beside me to offer me the snack as I was watching him he bend forward in a very obliging manner and I couldn't wait to ask him for another one. I gave him 20 rupees and he told me that it was 5 Rs a deal. He took out a piece of paper which he folded in a shape of cup to pour some ground nuts in it , but before he could do that some he thought of giving me my change in return. He took out few coins of ones and twos and started counting them to give me. He gave me a 5 Rs change. Some pieces few cause of the wind and me and Abhishek fought to collect them but couldn't help much as we knew old man wasn't able to. He made a gesture to not collect them any more and we stopped. He gave me 10 Rs and I got confused and returned him 5 Rs. The ground nuts were very good in fact and I offered them to Abhishek, he also liked it. And we got busy eating them but inside I was just thinking about this man and whether what I did was able to help him in some way. Should I have offered him more than he asked for? I was confused. And I wasn't able to look beyond what I was thinking and didn't know which stop and how he got off. But inside me I was filled with respect and admiration for that old man. He was old and might be having so many dependants to support. He wasn't begging but managing his resources. The ground nuts were not bad at all, being a junkie for ground nuts i can tell you they were of good quality. That old man was not capable of walking fast, he was not capable of shouting or crying for people to sell. All of his energy was just to roam around with basket full of snacks. All he spoke during our transaction were 5 Rs , that's it.
We got busy talking and when we were not talking I was lost in my thoughts. Suddenly, when I thought we were about to reach the station I look outside and saw a board that read "Jamia Osmania" and I shouted. And by the time I just got off the train started moving. Phew.... :)
We asked a passer by for the route to the university and to our shock we were inside university only. Then somehow talking to people of the road we reached our destination only to know that the lecture has been shifted to another spot. Till that time we had already walked 30 mins and it was right across Arts College building. After reaching there we asked few students that we could find for the direction to reach PRR Reddy auditorium. We got to the security check. The guard asked me to side to check the bag I was carrying. I asked me to show him the books that I was carrying , so I told him that I have brought them to distribute them for free. As soon as I told him that these books are for free. I told me that he is going to keep one for himself to read. And I was like ok. Here goes my 200 Rs in the gutter.:)
We got there and thanked god we were able to find a drinking water there. We got into the conference hall. And I gave Abhishek the chance to choose the seat for us. And he chose the one nearest to the stage he could seat. We sat and waited like for 20 mins or so after Dr. Swamy came.
We started from my home with a friend. He talked to one of his team mate who knew places around and asked him which stop to get off from MMTS. We inquired anyway from the counter and they told that they have a stop at JAmia Osmania on a train which goes to Phalaknuma. It wasn't long before we were on the train and we talked about personal and political stuff. I told him few things that i have noticed during my previous visit to Swamy g's conferences as it was his first one of this kind. He was very much calm and thoughtful. He has been like this since past few days. Don't know might be cause of personal stuff.
On one of the stop , don't know which one, I saw an old man, very old man selling some snack in a towkri he got up on the train. He was old. His legs were bend both of them. Don't was it cause of his old body or cause of the load he was carrying in one of hand. He was limping while walking. His whole was shaking while he was looking around for some customers. He was wearing a pare of thick glasses, quite old they were. I wasn't able to look through in his eyes. He wearing an old dhoti tied in a way that they were reaching till his knees only. I was just watching him and suddenly I asked him for a deal of roasted ground nuts. He was carry two kind of snacks one roasted ground nuts but wasn't able to figure out the next one but they were familiar and I know that I don't like them. He stood beside me to offer me the snack as I was watching him he bend forward in a very obliging manner and I couldn't wait to ask him for another one. I gave him 20 rupees and he told me that it was 5 Rs a deal. He took out a piece of paper which he folded in a shape of cup to pour some ground nuts in it , but before he could do that some he thought of giving me my change in return. He took out few coins of ones and twos and started counting them to give me. He gave me a 5 Rs change. Some pieces few cause of the wind and me and Abhishek fought to collect them but couldn't help much as we knew old man wasn't able to. He made a gesture to not collect them any more and we stopped. He gave me 10 Rs and I got confused and returned him 5 Rs. The ground nuts were very good in fact and I offered them to Abhishek, he also liked it. And we got busy eating them but inside I was just thinking about this man and whether what I did was able to help him in some way. Should I have offered him more than he asked for? I was confused. And I wasn't able to look beyond what I was thinking and didn't know which stop and how he got off. But inside me I was filled with respect and admiration for that old man. He was old and might be having so many dependants to support. He wasn't begging but managing his resources. The ground nuts were not bad at all, being a junkie for ground nuts i can tell you they were of good quality. That old man was not capable of walking fast, he was not capable of shouting or crying for people to sell. All of his energy was just to roam around with basket full of snacks. All he spoke during our transaction were 5 Rs , that's it.
We got busy talking and when we were not talking I was lost in my thoughts. Suddenly, when I thought we were about to reach the station I look outside and saw a board that read "Jamia Osmania" and I shouted. And by the time I just got off the train started moving. Phew.... :)
We asked a passer by for the route to the university and to our shock we were inside university only. Then somehow talking to people of the road we reached our destination only to know that the lecture has been shifted to another spot. Till that time we had already walked 30 mins and it was right across Arts College building. After reaching there we asked few students that we could find for the direction to reach PRR Reddy auditorium. We got to the security check. The guard asked me to side to check the bag I was carrying. I asked me to show him the books that I was carrying , so I told him that I have brought them to distribute them for free. As soon as I told him that these books are for free. I told me that he is going to keep one for himself to read. And I was like ok. Here goes my 200 Rs in the gutter.:)
We got there and thanked god we were able to find a drinking water there. We got into the conference hall. And I gave Abhishek the chance to choose the seat for us. And he chose the one nearest to the stage he could seat. We sat and waited like for 20 mins or so after Dr. Swamy came.
Friday, July 08, 2011
Monday to Sunday
Sitting in office on a cool morning of Saturday. Oh , its Saturday today, is it ? Oh! man , I completely forgot. I still came to office on 8 o'clock and is planning to come tomorrow too. Tomorrow , its going to be Sunday , right? Damn, coming on Sunday's too . Get a life , will ya ? What are you doing to yourself ? Did you know all this is going to happen to you ? Coming on weekends . Well , we should not call them weekends for you , they have been not more than like weekdays for you . Have been happening since past quite a few weeks.
You think you may come out of all this. There was a time when you used to waste so much of your weekend time doing nothing just sitting or sleeping or watching movies or just hanging out with friends burning that precious oil of yours . Well , see you have been saved from all that crappy stuff that you used to do and all that time is being utilized to do some productive work , for the company and for you at the same time.
(After 20 mins)
Oh, Sorry I got busy , in some work , well , office work to be precise . What,... you asking what kind of work ???? Well, its not something that worth telling . you see its completely illegal and out of companies policy to talk about the office work to outside. You cannot tell what have been keeping you so busy , soo God Damn busy that you skipping your friends , your meals , your phone calls as much as your life (not that anybody else really care about it except you yourself. ) but still , it counts. Yeah , you cannot talk about it , I think you understood it right now . If you haven't then you will certainly.
(After 30 mins)
Oh! m again completely Sorry , you know how it is ?
Well , where was I ? , yeah basically I cannot talk about what I am doing in Office right now, all I can do is its very important that i do it today , this time otherwise whole company will stop. No , no certainly its not something like fixing some kinda electric fault , but it certainly company just couldn't bear to get it done late. Everything else in this world can wait , but certainly not this one not today . Well enough of waiting and non-waiting .
I am quite certain I am not liking my work here , not this kind of work , not working on weekends . Working on weekends so that people can work on weekdays , its not that i don't work on weekdays . Working on weekdays is default and working on weekends is optional but certainly not for me, as you can see. I have not done my graduation to fuck up my life. I didn't worked hard or studied hard to fuck up myself hard. My friends are certainly laughing at me . Its not that i care if they laugh or not cause i know they are laughing on the outside but inside they also knew how much fucked they had already been . So lets enough of fuck and all . I think I should not write this anymore. Its really getting hot , may be they saving electricity for the weekdays , certainly don't want to waste it on weekends. Yeah and one good advise for all of you , have been told to me by my lead, I think most of you must be already knowing it but still wanna share :
"If Rape is inevitable , Just sit back and Enjoy."
You think you may come out of all this. There was a time when you used to waste so much of your weekend time doing nothing just sitting or sleeping or watching movies or just hanging out with friends burning that precious oil of yours . Well , see you have been saved from all that crappy stuff that you used to do and all that time is being utilized to do some productive work , for the company and for you at the same time.
(After 20 mins)
Oh, Sorry I got busy , in some work , well , office work to be precise . What,... you asking what kind of work ???? Well, its not something that worth telling . you see its completely illegal and out of companies policy to talk about the office work to outside. You cannot tell what have been keeping you so busy , soo God Damn busy that you skipping your friends , your meals , your phone calls as much as your life (not that anybody else really care about it except you yourself. ) but still , it counts. Yeah , you cannot talk about it , I think you understood it right now . If you haven't then you will certainly.
(After 30 mins)
Oh! m again completely Sorry , you know how it is ?
Well , where was I ? , yeah basically I cannot talk about what I am doing in Office right now, all I can do is its very important that i do it today , this time otherwise whole company will stop. No , no certainly its not something like fixing some kinda electric fault , but it certainly company just couldn't bear to get it done late. Everything else in this world can wait , but certainly not this one not today . Well enough of waiting and non-waiting .
I am quite certain I am not liking my work here , not this kind of work , not working on weekends . Working on weekends so that people can work on weekdays , its not that i don't work on weekdays . Working on weekdays is default and working on weekends is optional but certainly not for me, as you can see. I have not done my graduation to fuck up my life. I didn't worked hard or studied hard to fuck up myself hard. My friends are certainly laughing at me . Its not that i care if they laugh or not cause i know they are laughing on the outside but inside they also knew how much fucked they had already been . So lets enough of fuck and all . I think I should not write this anymore. Its really getting hot , may be they saving electricity for the weekdays , certainly don't want to waste it on weekends. Yeah and one good advise for all of you , have been told to me by my lead, I think most of you must be already knowing it but still wanna share :
"If Rape is inevitable , Just sit back and Enjoy."
Friday, July 13, 2007
Cold fish
We all have heard the phrase "As cold as fish". To be humorous , few years back when I was in 4th grade I use to think ...are these guys really cold ? Then I thought, yeah probably they might be 'cause they do not catch cold swimming in the water whether its summer or winter.....I was living with this dilemma, till one day in classroom I found myself get in to a serious conversation with my mentor about the issue....Why fishes are cold?...she told me that they are so 'cause they have no feelings for anything . They react to everything like a dumb ass. Counter questioning her I asked what if our sensing are not good enough to feel those reactions they(fish) show. She, then turning to the scientific facts , tried to convince me and I thought may she is right . Well it was good for me to accept that rather arguing only to deceit myself with no knowledge in hand about the so called coldness of fish.
But, why the hell I am telling these things. There are instances in life when something that occurred to you in the past comes as a whole new episode to your senses and lately that happened to me. There is one friend of mine, going home one day , asked me if I can take care of a little fish he was having. At that time , there were hardly students living in the hostel whom he knew and I was under his closest approach so he was left with no choice but me.
And like prudent gentleman I offered him my service. He told me to feed that guy in there three times a day. And next day he was gone handling me this lovely tiny creature of God.
Every morning when I woke up I feed him/her ,I don't know to be precise, I have this ambivalence , is there something wrong with this guy. I always find it sitting ,yeah may be floating but not moving at all, in the corner of the aquarium, which was large enough for him to roam around. Then a thought flashed my mind , may be he is in the process of getting used to his new temporary master. Then I keep on feeding him as I was told to do. Few days later I think about him , may be the reason behind him sitting is something else. What's bothering him is bothering me now . Every time I feed him ,see him , I tapped him (from outside) to see if he still breathing , to see if he is still going on with incarceration life. When this mayhem of mine in his peaceful habitat disturbs him , he flip his wings a little before going back to his resting place giving a blind eye to my further disturbances. I pity on this discordant creature. What wrong is with this guy. But one day , when i was feeding him ,I found him staring at me. I felt good, yeah, baby is coming back to life. But in spite of all these proceedings he was still, was diffident.
One day while feeding him, abdicating myself from the degree of master ,placing myself to his situation. I found myself alone. How would one feel lying in the same God Damn pool and doing nothing , talking to nobody. I regret his situation. Fish always found on group in all water bodies , may be for survival, but this guy here is having nothing to care for survival. All it needs is the company. I don't know what it means ,but it surely means that this guy here is not as cold as fish.
But, why the hell I am telling these things. There are instances in life when something that occurred to you in the past comes as a whole new episode to your senses and lately that happened to me. There is one friend of mine, going home one day , asked me if I can take care of a little fish he was having. At that time , there were hardly students living in the hostel whom he knew and I was under his closest approach so he was left with no choice but me.
And like prudent gentleman I offered him my service. He told me to feed that guy in there three times a day. And next day he was gone handling me this lovely tiny creature of God.
Every morning when I woke up I feed him/her ,I don't know to be precise, I have this ambivalence , is there something wrong with this guy. I always find it sitting ,yeah may be floating but not moving at all, in the corner of the aquarium, which was large enough for him to roam around. Then a thought flashed my mind , may be he is in the process of getting used to his new temporary master. Then I keep on feeding him as I was told to do. Few days later I think about him , may be the reason behind him sitting is something else. What's bothering him is bothering me now . Every time I feed him ,see him , I tapped him (from outside) to see if he still breathing , to see if he is still going on with incarceration life. When this mayhem of mine in his peaceful habitat disturbs him , he flip his wings a little before going back to his resting place giving a blind eye to my further disturbances. I pity on this discordant creature. What wrong is with this guy. But one day , when i was feeding him ,I found him staring at me. I felt good, yeah, baby is coming back to life. But in spite of all these proceedings he was still, was diffident.
One day while feeding him, abdicating myself from the degree of master ,placing myself to his situation. I found myself alone. How would one feel lying in the same God Damn pool and doing nothing , talking to nobody. I regret his situation. Fish always found on group in all water bodies , may be for survival, but this guy here is having nothing to care for survival. All it needs is the company. I don't know what it means ,but it surely means that this guy here is not as cold as fish.
Friday, June 29, 2007
Eccentricity connoting Poignance inadvertently.......
No one was around ,its only me and my computer playing a soothing and monotonous track ,I didn't know that track has ever been on my comp .That track has to be so close to the wind flowing through my room , exaggerating each and every emotion flurrying deep inside the corner of myself. I tried my best to exemplify them to myself. But every time I try, they try to go in skeptical swings of memories of the past. I remember, the night was full of stars and birds were chirping slowly to the rhythm of blowing wind as if trying to seduce the time to stay. Suddenly my heart filled with timidness and began to feel the subtleness of the past. The song was still playing that dubious track.
I was compliance to the present time, I was not able to concentrate on the paper lying in front of me on the table and not able to read a single sentence. Suddenly, the silence broke itself to the knock at the door. I gathered myself from what going on my head. I opened the door and ....there was no one but a wind pacing in through it. I reached outside and stood in the balcony in front of my room, searched my pocket to lit the only cigarette I was having. It was not there, may be I left it inside. My heart was still going in sporadic manner in the past trying to make it to the present but stymied by something, I don't know. I reached the place where I left the match box. I left it there impeccably, but its not there. I searched to find it dropped under the table. I grabbed it at once. I was feeling myself apocryphal to the fervor inside me. I lit my cigarette, stood to the wind in the balcony facing it and puffed it closing my eyes. I was lost inside me and nothing struck me then but the first sunlight of the sun slowly whipping off the night to the next day.
I was compliance to the present time, I was not able to concentrate on the paper lying in front of me on the table and not able to read a single sentence. Suddenly, the silence broke itself to the knock at the door. I gathered myself from what going on my head. I opened the door and ....there was no one but a wind pacing in through it. I reached outside and stood in the balcony in front of my room, searched my pocket to lit the only cigarette I was having. It was not there, may be I left it inside. My heart was still going in sporadic manner in the past trying to make it to the present but stymied by something, I don't know. I reached the place where I left the match box. I left it there impeccably, but its not there. I searched to find it dropped under the table. I grabbed it at once. I was feeling myself apocryphal to the fervor inside me. I lit my cigarette, stood to the wind in the balcony facing it and puffed it closing my eyes. I was lost inside me and nothing struck me then but the first sunlight of the sun slowly whipping off the night to the next day.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
One Day
Just few days back I was very much in busy schedule. Project work pending, my personal website that I started as one of my friend asked to build it, class test approaching .Phew! .what a shit .I set down on my table thinking for the start. Suddenly got dizzy and don’t know when I was snoring. I got up and found my project just on the verge of completion and my website was all made just to get load up ,my cg was as good as I cannot imagine. Oh! My GOD, what a relief and I was worrying so much, I said to myself what a stupid fellow I am, worrying with no reason. Ha! Then suddenly heard my friend knocking on the door suddenly I found myself lying on my bed upside down I got up and open the door friends were waiting for me to go to Chedis (a night hotel near my institute), I was, for a moment not able to got what was happening ,I was totally confused and shocked. And I found all my things right at the same state as they were before I went for the nap and now my friends waiting for me. I went with my friends thinking the dream will come true…….One Day.
Thursday, August 17, 2006
The Girl Next Door
I have seen this movie for more than 17 times and i still love to watch it with no forwarding. I like watching it alone ,with frnds .they all say that i have gone crazy.But there is something in this movie that i find intresting .That thing is its theme.
Now the theme of the movie,as it looks to me, is not just attraction or sex or love.This movie contains something which everybody knew but they never pay any heed . And thing is ,just finding one thing u realy care about ,be it anything anything. The thing which u put in front of everything ur carrier and ur needs.
Whenever I watch this movie I feel relax and forget all my worries .I watch it whenever i find myself a little tensed and confused. Its background music is mindblowing.I love to hear it again and again .
Now the theme of the movie,as it looks to me, is not just attraction or sex or love.This movie contains something which everybody knew but they never pay any heed . And thing is ,just finding one thing u realy care about ,be it anything anything. The thing which u put in front of everything ur carrier and ur needs.
Whenever I watch this movie I feel relax and forget all my worries .I watch it whenever i find myself a little tensed and confused. Its background music is mindblowing.I love to hear it again and again .
